The week of August 21-30 2025 my younger brother had been hospitalized in Cartersville, Georgia due to his heart. He had been battling with heart failure for at least two or three years. I went to see him when I got off work (I work night shift) on both Wednesday and Thursday August 27th and 28th. While I was there we just sat and chit chatted about much of nothing. he was upset that his wife even told me he was in the hospital. While I sat with him, I notified my other siblings about him being in there, especially after the doctor came in and told us his heart was operating at around 10%. I told them so we could all take part in being on top of him about his health, not just me. My one sister asked did I tell my dad to which I not only answered no, but told everybody else not to tell him either. My dad is 70 with enough of his own health issues to worry about. I didn’t want him worrying about that too. Especially since this wasn’t the first time my brother had been in the hospital for this, and I figured it wouldn’t be the last.

While I sat with him at the hospital, I also tried to get my cousin on the phone. We have a cousin I call his twin because they were born a day a part. My mother and her sister were at two separate hospitals at the same time in labor with those two. He beat her by just a few hours. Ironically enough while I was visiting him in the hospital due to heart issues, she was back home in Pennsylvania in the hospital after having her second heart attack. The twin cousins were in two separate hospitals at the same time both with issues with their hearts. Go figure. When I called, I couldn’t get her on the phone right then. I did, however, have him call his job, let them know he will be out for a considerable amount of time, and look into whether or not he had long term disability coverage because he was unsure. The boy was talking about missing work the days he was in the hospital as if he was going right back to work when he got out. I made sure to let him know that wasn’t happening.

My brother was released on Friday the 29th of August. With his heart only operating at 10%, they released him with a life vest. Its a vest you were that can sense your heart rhythms and will deliver up to 3 shocks if your heart gets wildly out of rhythm or stops. I had talked to my cousins and we laughed till I cried about a silly picture I had posted in the group chat. I updated her on my brother, and let her know I had updated him on her. She was set to go to a rehab upon her release from the hospital. I didn’t know why you go to a rehab after getting out of the hospital after a heart attack. After a quick Google AI search, I learned that cardiac rehab is considered an essential part of getting back on your feet and helping to prevent future attacks. You learn something new every day.

I got a call from my sister-in-law on Saturday the 30th of August with her sobbing so hard into the phone I couldn’t make out what she was saying. Once I could, I realized she was saying over and over again “He’s dead”. My brother had passed overnight while she was at work on the night shift. She came home to hear the alarms of the life vest going off and to see my brother half hanging off the bed. Long story short, after calling the brother right above me (I’m 1 of 9 children) and letting him know my husband and I were racing over to my brother’s house, we got to the house and was met by the coroner. He was definitely gone. Since then, her voice on the phone saying “He’s dead” plays over and over in my head. Many days I wake up, and before I can even fully open my eyes, I hear it in my head.

With the news spreading through my family throughout the day, I got many calls, texts, etc. Most everyone couldn’t believe it. The youngest of my mother’s children gone before the rest of us from a failed heart. The news reached my cousin in her hospital room in PA. I couldn’t help but think “Damn. The twin cousins were in the hospital for the same thing. Heart failure.” One made it through, and the other is gone. The very next day, my cousin was leaving the hospital to go to rehab. Then I got a call that she developed some bleeding in her heart and they were taking her into surgery. She didn’t make it. I had just sat and talked with him for two days straight and he was completely himself. I had just laughed till I couldn’t breathe on the phone with her. She was totally herself. Born a day apart, died a day apart. Both the youngest of their mother’s (Two sisters) children.

My brother’s wife couldn’t handle it. She was a complete wreck as to be expected. We had decided to have a double funeral back home in PA for the twin cousins. I took care of his arrangements here in GA. He was cremated with some of his ashes going into an urn, and some of his ashes going into necklaces for me, his wife, and his children. My cousin’s body would be present for the funeral, then she too would be cremated. As I was making all of the plans to get two van rentals, make sure everyone traveling from GA to PA had accommodations for the time we would be there, etc I got a letter from immigration that same week before we traveled.

Immigration informed me that, even after the various mountains of proof we had previously submitted, they needed more proof that my marriage to my Nigerian husband was real or his application for residency would be denied. Death of my brother, death of my cousin, possible deportation of my husband. Made for tv Lifetime movie type stuff. As I continued making all of the arrangements to get my brother taken care of and get everyone to PA on time and make sure all of the funeral arrangements were in place for he and our cousin I had to also gather everything I could think of to prove my marriage was real. When it rains, it pours.

Crazy thing is we had hit a serious rough patch that year before where I actually had asked for a divorce roughly around April/May of 2024. I was done. He continued trying and I wasn’t trying to hear it; already plotting a new life without him. Then around Christmas time, things changed and I started being more receptive to his gestures and requests to try again. We got through, and I decided that’s it. I’m staying put. I don’t have it in me to try another relationship, nor am I particularly jumping at the chance to become the lonely old cat lady. Almost a year later, I need to prove that my marriage is even legit. It would be ironic enough to be hysterically laughable if it wasn’t just one more thing compounded on top of everything else that was already going on at the time.

I gathered vacation pictures, special event pictures, notarized statements from family and friends, text messages (Even some of those that show conversations I had with my dad and brother about why I was so unhappy and the rough patch they were trying to counsel us through) everything I could possibly think of. We gave it to the immigration lawyer and submitted it. Now as the Christmas holiday and the New Year approaches, all we can do is wait to see what their decision will be.